Family Ties Or Just Knot

 

i thought i had a bad week the week before last.  but last week made it official. it was bad. so i want to make it brief but here is the scenario

 wednesday night:

 i had to work late for a meeting and got out of the meeting at about 7:30pm, from there i head to my aunt’s house for dinner, something I wasn’t planning to do but went really to see my grandparents. i don’t see them often.  anyways, i get over there and didn’t want to eat and leave so i stayed for a bit after the rest of the family had taken off. it was me and them at this point. them being my aunt and her husband.

 it was going okay, my aunt was packing up a “to go” bag for me and we were chatting about normal goings on. then wham… it came.  ikinda knew it would because you see my uncle is always negative about everyone around him… i think it’s some form of jealousy or maybe he is aware or feels in some way like he is less then everyone or inadequate, either way it branches from his own insecurities. he is really one of those “it’s always somebody else’s fault” type people.  he always bashes my work (in fact he’s become the laughing stalk and ongoing joke at my work just from his behavior alone, ha! they all know him there from his incessant annoying phone calls), my parents, the schools in my area, the people in the neighborhood i live in, etc.

 he started in on my work first… they aren’t helping…  what do i know about this person… blah, blah, blah, etc, etc… of course, trying to keep the peace, i brushed it off at first and truthfully he is not really worth my breathe, also, it’s an ongoing thing i just don’t even feed it anymore. if i give one answer he wants another and then another and pretty much no answer will suit him.

but then it took a turn.

he asked my aunt what was wrong with her mother (my grandmother), he stated that she seemed anxious. my aunt for some bizarre led it to being about my parents and not what it really was… that my grandfather can’t be out very long much more.  it’s just too hard for him. so i simply went on to say that maybe he was ready to go and that it was common for him these days. 

she says well maybe it’s because your parents didn’t want to drive them back and forth.

he then says it’s about time they started doing that and that maybe my parents made everyone anxious. sure mister bad attitude – they make everyone anxious it has nothing to do with your attitude towards everyone.

me: still silently sitting there but starting to get extremely agitated.  i was thinking to myself just hurry and help them clean and get out. so i then tried to change the subject.  i made it about me, bringing up my anxiousness, really something that happens to be none of their business and frankly these days they aren’t the best people to share information with anyways but nonetheless i gave it a shot.

 he puts it right back to my parents… talking about my mother and how she does nothing all day and has no obligations (hmmm…. Sounds lucky to me) and that she should be doing things. so on and so on. 

at this point i had had enough so i get up and say please don’t talk to me negative about my parents… i’m not going to listen to it. he continues. i say it again, and again, and again.

she interrupts us and tells me to listen and adds some random comments of her own.

now with my anger is at the complete point of boiling over and the steam is coming from my ears i say, after having to interrupt his loud condescending tantrum, that this is why i hate coming here and i’m leaving.

i walked to the door, and turned as he yelled to me “take the food we made you and leave!”.

that was it! i tossed it on the floor said to my aunt who by the way was standing right in front of me between us, she claimed to my grandmother she didn’t hear him say that… my guess if she didn’t hear it because she didn’t want to or that she now is blind and deaf to his horrid comments. from there i headed out the door, down the stairs to my car, with my aunt (who should not have taken sides) right on my tail.

t, she yells, you need to stop yelling and listen to him. you are negative all the time.

okay now if i’m negative it’s about someone’s action and it’s nothing i wouldn’t say to them and i don’t need to listen to anyone, especially him.

 now whats really sad is that he is always this way, condescending, rude, obnoxious, absolutely no social skills, and completely negative and she has just grown accustomed to it and in her opinion how he talks to people is okay.

 family ties or not… i will not be a part of it anymore and will not subject myself to it.

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